


Sincerely, Your Dead Friend

by Luna_Moon22



Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Character Death, F/M, Ghosts, Letters, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-05
Updated: 2016-08-26
Packaged: 2018-07-21 18:03:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 4,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7397869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luna_Moon22/pseuds/Luna_Moon22
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU where Nagisa was implied by tentacles in stead of Kayano, and Koro-sensei couldn't save him and he died.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own Assassination Classroom.

Hey Karma, 

I know you can’t hear me. And I know you can’t read anything I write to you. No one can anymore. And that makes me sad. I miss everyone in Class E. I miss Ms Bitch, and Mr Karasuma, and Kayano, and you. 

Though, even though no one can see me or hear me or knows I’m here, I still am. I’m still watching you guys. And even though you don’t have to anymore, I always enjoy watching you guys cleaning up the building every two weeks or so. 

Two years… I can’t believe it’s been two years. I’m lucky you guys still come back. Since I can’t actually leave. I don’t know what I’d do if the only person I ever saw was Koro-sensei. He’s still trying to teach me things. Even when he knows I can’t use them. He even lets me try to ‘kill’ him every now and then, even though you know why that doesn’t make any sense. 

And the worst part? Whenever I hear my name come up when you guys are talking. Everyone just stops smiling and stays quiet for a few minutes before someone either changes the subject or brings up the time I was forced by you guys to dress as a girl, or another of our stupid funny moments. Sometimes the time I kissed Kayano comes up. Did she always have a crush on me? Or did it just start when I kissed her?

I should have told her that I had a crush on her. I should have told her that’s why I went for the kiss in the first place.

Koro-sensei still laughs about you guys and your ‘class romances.’ You know Karma, you and Okuda are really cute together. And Sugino and Kanzaki are a pretty cool couple. Chiba and Hayami are perfect for each other, and Ms Bitch and Mr Karasuma are slightly odd, but work well.  
I’m sorry. I’m sorry that my name always drags your conversations down. I’m sorry I was stupid enough to charge at that monster and get impaled by those tentacles. I shouldn’t have done that. I can’t believe I got myself killed the day before I got to leave Class E. I’d wanted to become a teacher on Koro-sensei’s level. A teacher who could help kids who couldn’t rise above a certain point for whatever reason.

But here I am.

Trapped in the same place forever. 

Hey Karma, I know you can’t read this, nor can you respond to it.

But if I don’t ask, I’m never gonna stop thinking about it. 

What’s the outside world like now?

Do people still blame Koro-sensei for everything? Do they think he killed me? Who told my parents? Do my parents blame him? I hope they don’t. It wasn’t his fault. It was because I was stupid and didn’t want Kayano to run in and do something that would get her killed. But that’s what I ended up doing, isn’t it? It’s kinda funny.

But you deserved better. You deserved a better best friend. One who didn’t go charging into a deadly situation. One who didn’t get killed. I’m the worst friend. We had just started hanging out together again. Hell, we had just gone to SPACE together in an attempt to save the giant yellow octopus who shares the E Class’ former campus with me. 

But that’s not the point. The point is that I’m sorry. And I should have been a better friend. By that I mean I shouldn’t have gotten killed. 

Tell Kayano I love her. Or, I wish I could.  
Sorry again. 

Sincerely,

Your dead friend,

Nagisa Shiota


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Assassination Classroom

Hey Karma,

I haven’t written one of these in a long time. Mostly because Koro-sensei found the last one and tried to have a heart-to-heart with me about it. I didn’t really want to talk about it though, and he wouldn’t take no for an answer. And I wanted to avoid that happening again. 

But, getting my thoughts out helps deal with the soul-crushing loneliness. Even with Koro-sensei here, I’m kinda desperate for literally ANYONE else to talk to.

Another six years have gone by. Time feels so fast for me. Probably because it has no effect on me or my body. 

I was kinda surprised when you and Okuda got married at the campus. Though I was happy that I was able to watch. Kayano was the chief bridesmaid. And Sugino was your best man. Would you have picked me if I hadn’t gotten myself killed? But that’s not the point. The point is that it was really nice to be able watch your wedding. And Koro-sensei got all emotional. He said that you guys had ‘grown up so much.’ And he was so proud of you. 

Though, since you got married, you haven’t been coming back here nearly as often. I’ve heard the others talking about how you’ve become a bureaucrat. A well-paid one at that. And Okuda’s become a chemist. Exactly what both of you wanted to be. 

Seeing you all happy makes me happy. 

I just wish any of you could read my letters. 

And, you know, Kayano has been talking about how you and Okuda are gonna have a kid! A kid! You’re gonna be such a terrible influence on your kid, you don’t even realize. Every time you beat someone up while we were out together I knew that. But, you’ll still be a great father. And Okuda will be a great mother…

And Kayano’s an actress now! A famous actress! I could’ve been friends with a really pretty, really famous, wonderful actress. Maybe more than friends. If I’d ever had the guts to speak up. 

Anyway, to avoid Koro-sensei finding these again, I’m gonna be hiding them in your old desk from now on. Even though I know you’ll never see them. 

Koro-sensei is trying to look over my shoulder now at what I’m writing. So I’m gonna stop for now.

Tell Kayano I love her.

Sincerely,

Your Dead Friend,

Nagisa Shiota


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Assassination Classroom

Dear Mr Nagisa,

Hi! My name is Nagisa too! Nagisa Akabane! I know the letters you wrote weren’t for me, they were for my dad, but I thought that writing back would at least make you feel better about being alone!

My dad talks about you all the time! He’s always talking about how you were a really great friend, and he’s not mad at you for what happened. He’s always saying that he blames himself for not stepping in and helping you! He says that I’m named after you even though you’re a boy and I’m a girl! Then he laughs about the time you mentioned in your first letter when you dressed as a girl. He’s showed me the picture. You looked cute!

I’m 7 years old now. And Ms Kaede is my godmom! Dad says that if you were still around you’d have been my godfather, but Mr Tomohito is instead. 

Anyway, I found your letters when my parents brought me to your old campus for the first time. They told me how important this place was and how it was where they met and where you died and where they killed their teacher. Dad has never hesitated to talk to me about more ‘grown-up’ topics. And Mom always gets mad at him for talking to me about when they tried to assassinate their teacher, or when you died. But Dad always says that he shouldn’t censor himself around me because I won’t grow up right if they just try to protect me the whole time. I agree with Dad.

The teacher they mentioned, they said Ms Kaede named him Koro-sensei. Is he the same Koro-sensei who shares the campus with you? They say he was a really good teacher. 

Ms Kaede also misses you. She’s always talking about how she loved you and she wishes she’d had the opportunity to tell you. And then everyone gets sad. Dad always tries to tell everyone that you wouldn’t want everyone to remember your death, but your life. And Ms Kaede perks up after that. 

I wished I could have met you in person! From what others have told me, you were really cool and a really fun person! 

Oh, you may want to know, Mr Tomohito and Ms Yukiko had twin boys! And Ms Kaede is not married! And Mr Karasuma and Ms Jelavitch are going to be having a kid very soon! Dad hasn’t told me what that means though. Do you know?

And I don’t think Dad is a bad influence! He’s nice! And he’s always calm, even when talking to people he doesn’t like! 

Do you want me to read your letters to my Dad? And my Mom? And Ms Kaede? If they can’t see them like you said… Maybe that would work? Would that make you happy?

I’ll tell Ms Kaede you love her!

Sincerely,

Nagisa Akabane


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Assassination Classroom

Hey Nagisa,

Thank you for writing back to my letters. It does make feel less lonely that someone responded. It also makes me feel better that Karma isn’t mad at me for being reckless. But it wasn’t his fault either. 

Of course Karma named his daughter after me. He and Nakamura used to always make fun of me because I looked like a girl. And the time they made me dress like a girl, they actually made me flirt with a guy to distract from their attempts to break into a hotel. I’m not surprised he kept the picture. Thanks for saying it looked good though!

It makes me happy that Karma and Sugino have become so close. And that Okuda and Kayano are still such good friends. You know, they’ve always been really close. 

I’m also no where near surprised that Karma tells you those kinds of things. I’d be more surprised if he did try to protect you from that information. He’s never been the type to shy away from anything. He’s probably also teaching you to prank, hand-to-hand combat too. He was always really good at both of those. And I’m sure you get perfect grades. Both Karma and Okuda were brilliant students. Anyway, I agree with your father. They shouldn’t try to protect you too much.

The Koro-sensei Kayano named and the Koro-sensei who shares the campus with me are the same octopus, yes. And he is an amazing teacher. He’s been teaching me advanced geometry and calculus and pretty much every high school and college lesson everyone else had. He says it’s because he doesn’t want me to feel ‘left out.’ I don’t get his logic though. 

Karma’s right. I don’t want people to remember me for my death. I want them to remember my life and all the fun things we did together that year. Like the time we accidently landed that old man in the hospital before midterms and had to help out his pre-school instead of studying for the exams. Karma still aced the tests though. Ask him about that. I’m sure he’d tell you.

I wish I could meet you in person as well. I always thought that Karma and I would both have kids, and our kids would be really close. But that didn’t end up happening. And it’s great that Sugino and Kanzaki had twins! They haven’t brought them here yet, so I assume they’re too young to come all the way up the mountain. And it’s great that Ms Bitch and Mr Karasuma are having a kid!

I’m not going to tell you what that means. Your parents will tell you when you’re ready to know. 

And when Karma is calm around people he doesn’t like, it normally means he’s either threatening them, showing off, or bragging.

I’d love it if you read my letters to your parents and the other E class members. I know this may be hard, but I would love if you read them at the campus. I’d love to see everyone’s reactions to the letters, this one included. Thank you so much Nagisa!

Please tell Kayano I love her again.

Sincerely,

Your dead friend,

Nagisa Shiota

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will try to give updates every Tuesday... Please comment!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im sorry for the late update! I've been busy

Dear Mr Nagisa,

Did you see when I read your letters aloud? Everyone was there! Dad started crying! Dad cried! Dad! Dad cried! I’ve never seen Dad cry once in my entire life! Mom cried too. And Ms Kaede. And Mr Sugino. And everyone. Everyone cried. There were lots of hugs! Though I’m sure you saw. Dad and Ms Nakamura were talking about how sorry they were that they always made fun of you and made you crossdress. 

It kinda made me sad too. To see all those adults bawling while I just stood there reading them a letter a dead person wrote. It made me feel like I should have been crying too. Dad talks about you so much that I feel like I’ve known you my whole life, and yet I just stood there with a smile while they were all breaking down in tears. 

Dad and Mr Sugino did a lot of hugging after that. I’m sure you saw that too though. I should probably stop summarizing what happened. 

And I do get good grades! I have an A+ in both Math and Science and an A in every other subject! Mom says that if I keep my grades up I could end up in Kunugigaoka Class A when I take the entrance exam! I do plan to go to Kunugigaoka for Junior High School. Dad says that the current principal’s father was the principal when your class went to school here. And he also says that the current principal is definitely better and now he’d feel more comfortable sending me here. He says he wouldn’t have if the former principal still worked here.

Mom got kinda upset at Dad when she heard that you liked that he tells me that grown-up stuff. She said that you only thought that because you and Dad were so close. And Dad is teaching me pranks and Hand-to-Hand combat! He and Mom fight about that a lot. Dad’s argument is normally ‘if she ever gets bullied or attacked she should know how to defend herself.’ Then Mom says that he doesn’t need to teach me pranks to accomplish that. And Dad replies, ‘well Manami, what if another Koro-sensei shows up and she has to help kill him? She’ll use her pranking skills for that.’ Then they end up laughing about it. 

Dad says he finds it funny that Koro-sensei is still teaching you. He wants to know if you still sit at your old desk when he’s teaching you. Dad also wanted you to know that Sakura from the day care center is a private tutor now. And she’s doing really well for herself. He said that would make you really happy. And Dad told me about that. He said it was the first time he’d ever worked hard to get good grades on a test. And he was ranked as the number 2 student in the school that time. 

And you were right! Masaomi and Hide are only two years old, that’s why Mr Sugino and Ms Kanzaki haven’t brought them up the mountain yet. But they’re going to. 

And Dad gave me answers to the questions in your first letter. He said that the outside world isn’t that different from before you died, and that the world is still pretty mad at Koro-sensei. And they still think he took the E Class hostage. And the world does think Koro-sensei killed you. Though your parents don’t. And Ms Kaede says she always had a crush on you, it just took the kiss to realize it. 

And she says she loves you too.

Sincerely,

Nagisa Akabane.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Assassination Classroom

Hey Nagisa,

Yeah, I saw when you read the letters aloud. If I’m being completely honest, I was crying too. Koro-sensei was rubbing his tentacle in my hair trying to be ‘comforting.’ But he was probably crying just as much as anyone else. But I don’t know. Because I wasn’t looking. I was focussed on you guys. 

You know, Nakamura and Karma were only sorry once they figured out that I kept my hair long because my mom always wanted a daughter. And she forced all those girly outfits on me. I remember after Nakamura promised she would lay off, not five minutes later, she forced me into a skirt to talk to a guy and get him to buy food from us. 

I’m sure you’ll get into Class A. And you’ll have nothing to worry about since the Class E system has been abolished. That probably helps the students concentrate. Not having to worry about being mercilessly ridiculed by students who study harder. 

I’m sure you’ll have to kill one of your teachers at some point. Whether it’s to save the world or just because you want to. Karma knows what he’s doing. Just never use his pranks on your friends or your parents, or any of your parents’ friends. Use them for what they were intended to be used for. Self-defense. Karma once stuck hot mustard and wasabi in an assassin’s nose after he beat the guy in a fight. That’s what you should use your pranks for. 

I do sit at my old desk when Koro-sensei teaches me things. The octopus insisted. He said it would help maintain the learning environment. Even when I tell him learning new things is kinda pointless since I can never use them, he tells me that gaining knowledge is always important. I don’t understand his argument. But I go along. I think having someone to teach, even now, makes him happy. He still regards himself as our teacher first and foremost. 

Sakura… Can you ask your father how Sakura reacted when she found out I died? I would just like to know how she took it. 

Tell Kayano I love her.

Sincerely,

Your Dead Friend,

Nagisa Shiota


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Assassination Classroom

Dear Mr Nagisa,

I’m sorry that I haven’t written a letter in a while. A lot’s been going on recently. 

Mom created a synthetic blood that could apparently save a lot of lives. Dad was really proud of her. And a few weeks later Mom told me that I’m gonna have a little brother! I’m pretty excited about that. Then Dad explained what that means to me. 

Dad says that he and Ms Nakamura wanted you and Ms Kaede to get together. He says that the original reason was that they thought it would be easier to make fun of you guys if you were a couple. We laughed about that. Dad has a lot of good memories with you Mr Nagisa. And he says he’s sorry you guys drifted apart. And he wishes you had become closer sooner so you’d have had more time to just hang out. 

I’m gonna be taking the Kunugigaoka entry exam in two years. And I’ve been doing a lot of studying. Even though it’s almost two full years away. Mom and Dad both said that the entry exam is really hard and if I don’t start now I won’t stand a chance. But it might be different now, right? The principal when you guys went was a lot tougher than the current principal, right?

And Dad said the same thing about my pranking! He said that I should never use the pranks he teaches on anyone I’m friendly with. Then he gets a weirdly devious grin and tells me stories about times he beat up bullies. Then Mom tells him that I don’t need to know that. That’s really all they argue about. They’re usually on the same page. 

Dad says that Sakura got really sad and stopped going to school for a while. And he volunteered to tutor her for you. And once she did go back to school she got really good grades and worked really hard because she wanted to make you proud of her. And Mom says that Sakura is they’re go-to if I ever need a tutor!

Both Mom and Dad think it’s hilarious that you sit in your old desk when Koro-sensei teaches you things. And they also think it’s funny that he feels the need to make you feel ‘included.’

I’ll tell Ms Kaede you love her.

Sincerely,

Nagisa Akabane


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Assassination Classroom

Dear Nagisa,

Hey. It’s been a while, huh? I mean… like… 12 years about? Maybe 13. 13 years since I saw your face, 13 years since you saved my life. 13 years since I lost you forever. 13 years of regret. 13 years of wishing I’d just had the courage to say three simple words before you threw yourself at a giant tentacle monster to save all of us… It should’ve been me. You realize that, right? I should’ve been the one…

I miss you Nagisa. I miss you so much. I miss you like I miss my own sister. But… differently too. I wish I had told you how I felt. I wish I had just spit it out and hoped you reciprocated. But red-haired Nagisa tells me that you did… and that both makes me happy, and makes it worse. It makes it worse too. It makes me angry that I didn’t tell you. Because, if I had, maybe you’d have thought twice about running at that beast.

Koro-sensei tried to save you, you know. He insisted he could. I remember it like it was yesterday. “I know I can. I can save him. What kind of teacher would let one of his own students die? I’ll save him.” But you were already gone. We were too late. Then Koro-sensei… he let us kill him. Karma dealt the final blow. He said you would’ve been the one if you were still there, and he wanted to take your place. 

And Karma and I went to tell your parents. We went together, we were the two closest to you, so we thought it’d make sense. They showed up to the graduation ceremony, and asked where you were. So Karma and I told them that we needed to talk to them away from the crowd. And when they found out… Your mom started crying. She fell over too. And your dad just stood there with a shocked look on his face. Like he didn’t believe what we’d told him. He probably didn’t at first.

But they never blamed Koro-sensei. Never. They never even suggested that Koro-sensei hadn’t done his best to save you. That he had been a bad teacher. That he hadn’t cared. Unlike the rest of the world, which latched onto your death and used it to push their own agenda. They claimed that Koro-sensei had finished you off himself. Which all of us knew was total bullshit. We tried to talk to them, well, Isogai did. Isogai stayed our representative. But none would listen. They instead claimed that we had been ‘tricked by the monster.’ Everyone got so mad. They dared call Koro-sensei a ‘monster’ or a ‘murderer.’ He would never hurt any of us. Ever. Tell him all of us know that. And all of us miss him like crazy. 

Anyway, I’ve gone back to acting. And I’m using my old name again. Akari Yukimura. But everyone from Class E still calls me Kayano. And Nagisa, and Kuroki (Chiba and Hayami’s daughter), and Masaomi and Hide (Sugino and Kanzaki’s twin boys). I’m sure you would’ve called me Kayano too. 

I’m sure you would’ve loved the world how it is now. Even with the blame put on Koro-sensei, Principal Asano was forced to step down and the E Class was abolished. I’m sure you knew that though. 

I miss you so much Nagisa. I miss everything about you. I wish you were here. I wish I had told you how I felt. I wish I hadn’t let you run at that damn monster. I wish I had stopped you. I wish I had stopped you. Even if it meant I would've been the one to die. 

But now, 13 years later and after the unthinkable happened to you, I finally have enough courage to tell you what I’ve always wanted to tell you. Directly. On my own. With my own writing.

I love you.

Sincerely,

Kaede Kayano

**Author's Note:**

> I have most of this story written already, so I will be updating probably like once a week. Thanks for reading!


End file.
